Saturday 1 April 2023

My Dentist Brings Me Up To Date

 

John Lavery, The Dentist, 1929

There's never any white knuckle gripping of the chair when Your Correspondent makes a visit to the dentist, it being a rather more relaxed and convivial affair, principally because there's nothing amiss with my fangs. The White Lab Coat of Authority as seen on this dashing dentist morphed sometime ago into white t-shirt, denims and Italian shoes on my long-time former dentist and latterly into navy scrubs and clogs on his fashionably-tattoed 20-something niece who has taken over the practice. 

The picture hasn't changed much from above, although I was wearing slightly less jewellery for the occasion of my checkup and clean. And I'm not really a candidate for the Swarovski crystal tooth gems she has introduced to the dental menu. Very groovy (is that still a word? I forgot to ask) music still plays, as does video footage over the chair of sea life frolicking possibly in The Great Barrier Reef, all meant as a distraction from what's going on at the business end, but none of that was necessary yesterday. My dentist and her assistant were busy bringing me bang up to date on the vernacular of Gen-Z.*

It started with Ghosting. The term came up when she was regaling me with an anecdote about visiting a cheese place nearby. We'd moved off a bit of preliminary teeth chat into dietary changes which segued into her talking about visiting this place with her last assistant before she was ghosted by her. There was that word! I really haven't had a proper explanation as to what it means. I saw my chance, Dear Reader, and as soon as hands and whatnots were out of my mouth, I asked if she'd talk me through Ghosting. 

She and her lovely new assistant were only too delighted. It was a simple enough explanation - more or less vanishing without trace or warning - but the anecdote which illustrated this example was utterly enthralling, despite the what? why?? nature of it. When another breather between proceedings cropped up, I asked if there was anything else I need to know about. I was trying to remember another vaguely understood societal term I hear bandied about - maybe it was Gaslighting? - but instead I promptly landed into an enlightening tutorial on completely new-for-me vernacular by the young women. All to do with dating.

I learnt all about Love-bombing (being smothered by someone with affectionate intensity at the beginning and then when you're hooked they drift away); Breadcrumbing (just leaving enough crumbs on social media so your target doesn't lose interest); the coloured flag system of classification of potential dates and some acronyms appropriate or not for your "profile". Not only did I come away with a nice professional scrub of the fangs but my marvellous dentist brought me the priceless gift of knowledge and I'm now right up to date.




* It's rather nice to find yourself, ahem, tradesmen to look after one's physical condition when you take yourself off to the shop, so to speak, who are young for they can outlive you. Rummaging around for replacements after one takes retirement, or even drops off their perch, is not for the faint-hearted. A couple of my -ologists are ageing alongside me but luckily the newer arrivals into the diary seem like positive children


Image credits: 1: British Dental Association Dental Museum; 2: Graphics Fairy

21 comments:

  1. Groovily groovy!!!

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  2. Pain anywhere on the body is awful. If you have work done on your ankle or fingers without adequate local anaesthetic, you will still hate it. But your mouth is the centre of your face and once the dentist and his/her dental nurse put their hands into your mouth, you are VERY vulnerable.

    So whatever makes the whole business more relaxed, I say well done Dentist! Music, tv casual clothing, friendly discussions etc etc.

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    1. Ah, pain, a whole other discussion, dear Hels. Luckily pain doesn't coincide with my dental visits since the gnashers are in good shape but my dentist really has done an exemplary job in making the space less clinical. There are even lovely leafy views out the arched picture windows!

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  3. Recently, I too, learnt about ghosting, but I don't think that is a great way to treat anybody that you respect or have been in a relationship with. It must be devastating for the other person involved.

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    1. It is, indeed, dear Rosemary, one of the most extraordinary of the modern ways of treating one another. My first thought goes to catastrophe - illness?, car accident?? - but there's apparently no pressure to even give a reason for the vanishing. And the anecdote I heard about in detail was a professional example. Imagine not showing up for work anymore, without feeling you need to give an explanation!

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  4. I have only heard that word "GHOSTING" on the TV!THANK YOU LITTLE BAT for your translation...........can I get you to explain WOKE?!!
    Happy to hear you are doing well and the DENTI are GLEAMING!
    BIH HUG..........XXX

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    1. Oh, Dear Contessa, Woke could be beyond me! I didn't think to ask the Oracles :) All I really understand of being Woke is that one engages in competitive offendedness with one's peers. The most offended by the state of the world and human engagement in the past or present, wins. xx

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  5. Love-bombing – interesting oxymoron, inteeth ... äh ... indeed.

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    1. Isn't it so, dear Sean, and yet the devastation the love-bomber leaves behind can be apparently real!

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  6. I'm not a fan of Dentists (don't ask), but I did once visit one in London who had set-up his practice specifically aimed at the 'Pop Star' market. His surgery was more like a very up-market sitting room, and there was interesting music playing. I believe he advertised his services by sending his details to all the London recording studios. He was good.

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    1. That sounds very chic, blurring the lines between comfort and pain, dear Cro! Very rock star. And I bet very $$!

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  7. Hello Pipistrello, By coincidence I was just reading Ira Glackens' account of a visit to the dentist in the early 1900's: "He got out his drill. The next step was to hollow out the cavity in proper shape. The burr, being old and worn, instead of cutting, polished the tooth until it was hot and almost sang....The gold, in tiny curls, was placed in the cavity bit by bit, and with mallet and punch securely rammed in." One dental torture device "was designed on the principal of the thumbscrew...a couple of quick twists and the teeth separated like magic, allowing the dentist all the time in to world to fill, polish and poke about." The icing on the cake was that the filling fell out on the way home. Incidentally, the victim was his grandmother, not Ira himself. I'm sure he brushed his teeth assiduously after that day.
    --Jim

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    1. Oh, dear Jim, this sounds horrendous!! As a cautionary tale against neglecting the flossing and brushing, there is nought better :) I cannot imagine how this felt, except I do feel a little bit faint at the moment - were dental anaesthetics around then? There had been a long tradition, apparently, around the same time for girls to have all their teeth pulled and pristine dentures put in their place as an 18th or 21st birthday gift. The idea was that it would give them a perfect smile and save them future dental tortures and as you describe, and their future husbands the expense!

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  8. I used to fear going to the dentist as it would be painful; now I fear going as it will be costly.

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    1. Dear Urspo, the $$ do rack up quickly for such luxuries as dental attention. You can understand only too easily why just whipping out an offending tooth by your local barber or somesuch was once the all the rage.

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  9. Dear Pip, in a few weeks I have an appointment with my "new" dentist in Bavaria (who till now is really impressive).
    During my time in Hamburg I had such a marvellous dentist that after moving to Berlin I travelled some years from Berlin to Hamburg (I did that for my haircutter too). Then I got a hot tip for a posh dentist in Berlin - I went to him during the pandemic - and deeply regretted that I didn't ghost him.
    His bills were better be read in mild diffusing gaslight, but that I had expected - but shame on him for ignoring my complaints about a molar (and I am very good about feeling into my body). He just put a new expensive crown over it - and now the Bavarian has do to root canal treatment - uiiii.

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    1. Oh, dear Britta, I feel for you!! How ghastly to have a worse procedure to face. You may not have ghosted him when you should have but you could certainly tell your tale of woe to all your Berlin friends. A little bit of revenge for the expense and misery you've had to endure is entirely fitting.

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  10. Dear Pip, be tremendously pleased with yourself that your teeth are in fine fettle. I have a long dental history and am very fearful of any treatment. I am about to embark on a series of long and VERY expensive visits to the dentist. It has been impossible to find an NHS dentist since moving house. I explained to the private dentist when I went for x-rays and inspection, "I'm very nervous." "Yes," she said, "You've already told me."

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    1. Oh, no, dear Rosemary, not you, too?? 'Tis the season for expense and misery, courtesy of all things dental, for my blogging friends. Be brave! I am so grateful to be exempted from such, for we only need one per household to keep our dentists jetting off on skiing holidays and sinking more backyard swimming pools. Mr P owns, as we jest, six-million-dollar-teeth and only last week received a jaunty message from his luxe dentist (as opposed to my budget-friendly local girl) saying he was looking forward to seeing him soon!

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